Mourning......to Morning

[Scent of Cedar *]

Hello, New Leaf. I have been skimming posts to see whether you were here with us. How kind of you to reach out to Darkwing, and how good for you to have done so.

My thanks to you for being here and sharing your viewpoint. Your responses are real and kind.

Stay on your course and know that your story and willingness to truthfully share has positively impacted many. That my dear soldier is the firm foundation you can stand on as you make your life anew

I agree.

Welcome, Darkwing.

Cedar

 

[ColleenB]

Leafy

So glad to see you are here, and what an amazing poem about your child. I was entranced by it.

You have so much to give to others, I hope you have some loving arms around you right now in your time of hurt.....

I send you positive thoughts and loving vibes

((Hugs))

 

[Kalahou]

Hello, New Leaf. I have been skimming posts to see whether you were here with us. How kind of you to reach out to Darkwing, and how good for you to have done so.

Me too, Leafy,
I'm thankful to see you here with us. Continued love, thoughts and pule are with you.
Bless. ~K

 

[New Leaf]

Mahalo friends. Trying to catch my breath one moment, one day at a time. It still feels like the twilight zone. I suppose time will ease the disbelief, emptiness and pain..........ke Akua please watch over us.
Leaf

 

[Lil]

First and foremost, Leafy, HUGE hugs to you...you are in my prayers.

Now to hijack the thread for just a moment.

I can't fix a car, or cook a meal. It is only by the grace of God that I can shave, and I am really not very good at that. Learned through trial and error.

I am not very well educated, or mature.

LEARN! Learn, learn, LEARN!

Young man, if you want to learn to cook, I bet that aunt of yours would LOVE your assistance in the kitchen. If she can't cook, well, get a cookbook, watch YouTube videos, and give it a go yourself! You don't have to bake a cake or make a standing rib roast. Start small. Make an omelet, make tacos, or pull out the "man card" and barbeque something. If you want to know how to fix a car, take a class. If you can't afford a class, go to the local library and check out "Mechanics for Dummies" - A book I've never seen, but I'm sure it exists.

Education is worth nothing if you do nothing with it. I've seen many, many people who have Bachelor's Degrees and have NEVER worked in the field they studied. You don't have to go to college to be mature or well-read.

My friend, find your passion - there's something that you find fulfilling. If it turns out to be something that earns money, it's a career. If it doesn't, it's a hobby. You are young - there's time.

Do you know how valuable you are to US? We are all of us struggling with out children - but we can't talk to them, we can't understand them. We WANT to...but many times we simply can't. YOUR insight is a God-send. Really.

I believe everyone has a purpose. Maybe helping people like us is yours?

Still working on doing the right things.

That right there - better than half the people out there.

 

[Albatross]

Thinking of you today, Leafy. Still being as kind and loving to others as always, I see. Hugs to you, dear friend.

 

[DarkwingPsyduck]

First and foremost, Leafy, HUGE hugs to you...you are in my prayers.

Now to hijack the thread for just a moment.





LEARN! Learn, learn, LEARN!

Young man, if you want to learn to cook, I bet that aunt of yours would LOVE your assistance in the kitchen. If she can't cook, well, get a cookbook, watch YouTube videos, and give it a go yourself! You don't have to bake a cake or make a standing rib roast. Start small. Make an omelet, make tacos, or pull out the "man card" and barbeque something. If you want to know how to fix a car, take a class. If you can't afford a class, go to the local library and check out "Mechanics for Dummies" - A book I've never seen, but I'm sure it exists.

Education is worth nothing if you do nothing with it. I've seen many, many people who have Bachelor's Degrees and have NEVER worked in the field they studied. You don't have to go to college to be mature or well-read.

My friend, find your passion - there's something that you find fulfilling. If it turns out to be something that earns money, it's a career. If it doesn't, it's a hobby. You are young - there's time.

Do you know how valuable you are to US? We are all of us struggling with out children - but we can't talk to them, we can't understand them. We WANT to...but many times we simply can't. YOUR insight is a God-send. Really.

I believe everyone has a purpose. Maybe helping people like us is yours?



That right there - better than half the people out there.

Funny story; when I first moved in with this aunt and uncle, I didn't know the first thing about them. And they knew very little about me. So it was understandably pretty awkward at first. They were both working long hours, so I basically had the run of the place much of the time. I got hungry one night, and wanted to try to make chili in a can. But I couldn't figure out how to use a can opener. I am not kidding, I tried for half an hour without success. Eventually, I got kind of annoyed, and started beating the can against a rock in the back yard. STILL wouldn't open. I put it back in the pantry, and just gave up. It was still awkward, so I was never asking my aunt for anything at all. A few months go by, and she is rooting around in the pantry and finds that can of chili. I explained what had happened to it, and she found it pretty amusing. That day, she went out and bought an electric can opener, and a cookbook full of very simple meals to make. Still cannot prepare a single one. To me, if I can't put it in a microwave, it may as well be inedible. Even if it can be put in the microwave, it is often still inedible. I am THAT bad of a cook.

 

[DarkwingPsyduck]

And I am just as clueless when it comes to cars, and tools. My dad wasn't exactly the teaching type. In fact, the ONLY thing he actually taught me was how to take a punch. Which, admittedly, has come in handy on more than one occasion. He also taught me how NOT to treat a woman. Indirectly and unintentionally.

 

[Lil]

You're clearly a very bright young man. That's obvious from how well you write and express yourself. I've had girlfriends who couldn't nuke a hot dog. Most people can't fix cars. You will find your talent. And I believe you can learn anything you put your mind to.

 

[DarkwingPsyduck]

And now, a joke!!!

My great-great grandfather didn't travel 4000 miles across the ocean to watch this country fall to drug addiction.


He did it because he killed a man back in Ireland.

 

[InsaneCdn]

Cooking.
Having taught four males how to do this, three of them by "telephone instruction" rather than in person...

If I was going to teach you to cook, here's the things that would be at the top of my list:
1) from-scratch hot oatmeal (microwave method)
2) eggs, at least one of: fried, scrambled, boiled, poached
3) one of pasta, rice or potatoes
4) roasted chicken (whole or pieces)
5) basic steamed veggies

With these basic skills, you can make breakfast and supper, and it isn't hard to make a sandwich for lunch.

Once you can do these, you can learn more generic skills - frying, simmering, etc. Depending on your taste in food. Some people like stir-fries, which take a little prep work and cook quickly. My son is a red-meat lover and hates chicken, so his go-to supper is ground beef (he does either burgers or tacos).

 

[DarkwingPsyduck]

Cooking.
Having taught four males how to do this, three of them by "telephone instruction" rather than in person...

If I was going to teach you to cook, here's the things that would be at the top of my list:
1) from-scratch hot oatmeal (microwave method)
2) eggs, at least one of: fried, scrambled, boiled, poached
3) one of pasta, rice or potatoes
4) roasted chicken (whole or pieces)
5) basic steamed veggies

With these basic skills, you can make breakfast and supper, and it isn't hard to make a sandwich for lunch.

Once you can do these, you can learn more generic skills - frying, simmering, etc. Depending on your taste in food. Some people like stir-fries, which take a little prep work and cook quickly. My son is a red-meat lover and hates chicken, so his go-to supper is ground beef (he does either burgers or tacos).

At the worst my addiction ever got, I was down to around 110 lbs. When I SHOULD be 130-145. I am naturally skinny, but not THAT skinny. Even now, I only weigh about 122lbs. What can I eat to gain more weight? I got used to not eating a whole lot due to not always having the luxury of eating. I eat when I am hungry now, but I am never that hungry. Still have to force myself to eat at times.

 

[InsaneCdn]

Needing to gain weight is a problem lots of us would love to have

Having said that... for years, my mom was in that situation. Had a medical condition that burned calories at a serious rate. She HAD to consume considerable calories just to maintain her weight. So, some hints:

1) Make sure your diet includes foods that are both nutrition-dense and calorie-dense. Some examples are avocados, nuts, dried fruit, whole-milk cheese, high-quality dark chocolate. Small quantities of these have a significant impact on both nutrition and calories.

2) Don't snack within 2 hours of a planned meal. It will kill your appetite. Snack after eating is fine.

3) Avoid "diet" drinks. Naturally zero-calorie drinks are fine - water, herbal tea. Milk is good. Natural juices are ok in moderation. Skip high-sugar, low-nutrition drinks (like soda).

4) When possible, double up on your toppings. Baked potato... with butter? or sour cream? How about both. That pat of butter is a few more calories.

More than eating, though, your key to putting on weight is probably going to lie in putting on muscle. That warehouse job may help. Muscle burns calories. More muscle burns more calories. And building muscle burns calories.

 

[Scent of Cedar *]

A few months go by, and she is rooting around in the pantry and finds that can of chili.

That is a funny story.

I like it that a few months have gone by since you came to live with your aunt. That you are still there means you are doing your best, by her and by yourself.

How proud I am, of and for you. My son was able to stop using. He stopped so many times, but this time he seems to have done it. I know a little bit about how impossibly hard it is to stop living that lifestyle, and I feel very proud for your sake.

***

Insane Cdn, you will have Darkwing up to speed and cooking for his whole family before we know it.

:O)

Cedar

 

[Lil]

I agree with InsaneCdn. You can cook. Start small. Did you know you can microwave scrambled eggs? My son learned at 10 or 11, so I know you can do it. Break the eggs into a bowl and whip them with a fork, add a bit of butter. Microwave for about 1 minute and stir. If they are still runny, put back in for 30 seconds and then stir again. Keep doing that until it's all cooked. Be careful, the bowl is hot and don't forget to take the fork out before you put it in the microwave. lol

Pasta is my kid's go-to. Mac and Cheese from a box...easy. Just make sure the pan is big enough for the pasta to boil in. Spaghetti with a jar of sauce. If you want to get fancy, buy frozen meatballs, put them in a pot with the sauce and cook over medium/low heat until they are boiling, then turn them down and let them sit on low while you make the noodles.

I bet a lot of us could give you enough hints to get you cooking simple things. Maybe we should start a thread for that over on the Watercooler?

I could tell you how to lose weight...gaining? I'll leave that to others.

 

[InsaneCdn]

I bet a lot of us could give you enough hints to get you cooking simple things. Maybe we should start a thread for that over on the Watercooler?

OR over in Healthy Living - that's where a lot of food discussions have happened in the past...

 

[Lil]

OR over in Healthy Living - that's where a lot of food discussions have happened in the past...

I think I'll do just that. Darkwing, see us over there.

 

[DarkwingPsyduck]

Heh, thank you all. Though, it appears I have hijacked this thread. Sorry, didn't mean to.........