We just kicked him out.

[Hope_Floats]

Lil, I love you and are in your shoes, and am rooting for you and Marina like crazy, but I just read your above quoted text and can make no sense of it whatsoever. If I were a difficult child and were trying to ascertain from that what exactly I needed to do, I would have absolutely no idea.

 

[Lil]

I take it you mean this part?

We need you to show us substantial change and even we don't know what that is right now. I don't want to upset you, but I also don't want you just screwing off instead of getting on with life, expecting to come home any day now.

We've had multiple talks with him when he was home about getting a job, keeping a job, stop running around with his slacker friends, stop being so lazy and dirty (he bathes very sporadically). He knows what I mean by a substantial change. What I don't know is how much or for how long before that will be enough to change our minds.

I'm pretty sure he gets it. The point I was trying to make to him was this appointment is not just a "we'll talk it out and he'll come home" meeting. We aren't prepared to welcome him back with open arms and he has to make some serious changes in his life before that will ever be the case.