Dear mom, I can relate because I am a mom who as well has a son just turned 28 with same/ similar issues. I raised my son alone after leaving his father, my husband who was an alcoholic and drug addict as well as very abusive. I know my inability to overcome many of my own problems have affected his life and caused him many if the problems he has atm. However I am/have learned/ am still learning how to put up healthy boundaries as I am in recovery to pain pills for nearly 4 years and getting ready to graduate the program in 6-7 months. I was adopted and abused until I was placed in a group home at 15, but by then the damage was done. I didn't understand the phycology of it until I was in recovery myself, and now I find myself feeling guilty and on occasion giving in by giving him $ because I know I helped put him in this position by my codependency and trauma. Here is a video that helped me a lot. Don't focus on the spiritual part as it may not be for you, rather listen to the mother's word's and heart. Much love, Mom from PennsylvaniaI am in the struggle of my life, trying to set boundaries and watch my son go down hill. He has had many problems with responsibility his whole adult life and we, my husband, his stepdad, have enabled him since he was 18. He has had addiction problems but mostly just severe inability or refusal to deal with life. He was evicted in June from an apt I paid for, and is living in his car that we pay for. (have to, was stupid enough to co pay 1 1/2 years ago.) We have stopped most of support, but I still get sucked in and it is killing me, not to mention affecting my job and marriage. Some days I am so strong and sure I am doing the right thing, other days I am just sad. Im not conflicted about not enabling him anymore; I fully believe this is the right thing to do, but winter is coming and watching him be homeless is so hard. I am getting ready to get a restraining order so he will stop calling me at work; up to 50 times a day!!!! We had to get a no trespassing orderr to keep him from coming to our house to demand money for a hotel. I am a fool but I listen to the voicemails and call him back!!! Im in therapy and reading tons about co dependancy and enabling, but I'm not following the program very well lately. I think codependancy in a parent child relationship is harder to break, especially for a mother. I changed my cell phone number and now have peace on weekends, but come to work to tons of desperate voicemails. His tale lately is that he cant get a job because he has no clean clothes and cant shower: both untrue. I keep telling him to go to mental health clinic. I need peace and I need strengh to watcth this play out.
Screw Mothers Day - A Vulnerable and Personal Share on Human Love Versus Unconditional Love ❤️
I share my personal journey with my own son and how much emotional and narcissistic behavior I allowed myself to be put through before I decided to take matt...