My current husband (not ex...he was pretty useless with the kids) had never had a child before Sonic and Jumper and he did everything I did with them. We did not always or even often take on old gender roles that I don't think exist as much today as they did back when Mom stayed home all day.
My son always did as much for his son as his ex did. I saw him feeding, diaper changing cooking etc. My daughters boyfriend changes diapers, changes clothes, cooks, etc. He cleans the house with her too. I am not sure but I don't think they are unusual. Not anymore.
As far as early potty training I didn't care about that at all. I figured they'd do it when ready. In my house, the girls were early and the boys were late but it didn't give me any grief...they are all trained now
(I hope!!)
I had a yukky childhood and did not try to duplicate old ways...I was good with the new. I still am, even at my age. My mother was a lazy mother anyway. She did the bare minimim and I never looked to her as somebody I wanted to copy. If anything I did what my BFFs did (I had two, one passed
). They and my darling, special mother in law guided me more than anything that was from my childhood.
I am happy for those with happy childhood memories
My best time of life truly started when I hit the jack pot with my amazing husband of 23 years. Things have gotten better and better each year since him.
We did childcare OUR way and our kids claim they had great childhoods! Thank you, Tom, the love of my life! (His birthday is Sunday and he retires in May! Yaaaay! We can travel!)
Maybe this childhood difference is why you are soothed by the past and I like leaving the old ways back where they were. It's interesting to discuss though!!