NOLA
New Member
I have come to the realization that I am just not capable of sitting back and enjoying a normal life while watching our 16 y/o difficult child go full throttle ahead into the abyss. One day Im on board with it (knowing its not all about me its about him growing up his way and learning from his mistakes) and the next day I have this dreaded feeling of panic that I must DO SOMETHING to counteract his behaviors (still knowing its not all about me its about him growing up his way and learning from his mistakes but isnt it our job as parents to make sure they have a good chance of growing up?). Even if it ends up being for naught at least we tried something.
Current situation is he is off of house-arrest :bravo:, still hasnt found a job :crying: but insists hes just waiting for the call :rofl: to start at a restaurant as a dishwasher (same place where another one of his druggie 19 y/o pals work that kid just got out of jail after 2 days stopped for some minor violation but had 2 attachments car impounded and now he rides his bike (sorry, not his bike, another difficult childs little brothers bike) to work what a role mode to aspire to) :hammer:. Here I am speaking ill of this kid but at least he graduated high school & lives on his own.
difficult child also insists hes not doing any drugs but hes not kidding anyone in their right mind (even though my husband still falls for his excuses) :surprise:. We brought him several days ago to the PO to have a drug screen (results take quite a few days to come back so we havent got confirmation yet) then I suspect the next day he smoked weed & took Ecstasy so I stopped & picked up a drug test from the pharmacy long story short every panel came back negative (even marijuana) however, urine didnt look like urine to me (husband even went into the bathroom with-him but wasnt exactly scrutinizing his every move) he explained in his usual matter-of-fact way Ive been drinking a lot of water lately & that must have affected the color. I dont believe him. Next day I requested husband take him to PO again for yet another screen they must think were nuts. I suspect we will have both results within the next few days. :grrr:
I guess Im just looking for a vote of confidence :thumb: or been there done that rationale :thumbsdown:for why or why not I should proceed. My plan is (if the tests are positive which everyone on the planet knows they will be except my husband) to immediately transport him to another rehab center; one that is on our insurance plan, then upon his release put him directly into a wilderness camp for another 30+ days. Upon his return home he will have a clear and drug-free head, hopefully do some soul searching and be competent to make a decision concerning what HE WANTS to do with his life. During his away time husband & I will get some counseling :doctor: and come up with a game plan for what we will and will not tolerate from him. I havent exactly worked all that out yet. Obvious things will be go the GED route or traditional diploma either way we will support HIS decision. If he wants to attend college, we will support and pay for that. If not, he will need to get a full-time job while living with us.
As usual, thanks for listening and thanks most for your input. I apologize for all of the icons but it's new to me :smile:
Current situation is he is off of house-arrest :bravo:, still hasnt found a job :crying: but insists hes just waiting for the call :rofl: to start at a restaurant as a dishwasher (same place where another one of his druggie 19 y/o pals work that kid just got out of jail after 2 days stopped for some minor violation but had 2 attachments car impounded and now he rides his bike (sorry, not his bike, another difficult childs little brothers bike) to work what a role mode to aspire to) :hammer:. Here I am speaking ill of this kid but at least he graduated high school & lives on his own.
difficult child also insists hes not doing any drugs but hes not kidding anyone in their right mind (even though my husband still falls for his excuses) :surprise:. We brought him several days ago to the PO to have a drug screen (results take quite a few days to come back so we havent got confirmation yet) then I suspect the next day he smoked weed & took Ecstasy so I stopped & picked up a drug test from the pharmacy long story short every panel came back negative (even marijuana) however, urine didnt look like urine to me (husband even went into the bathroom with-him but wasnt exactly scrutinizing his every move) he explained in his usual matter-of-fact way Ive been drinking a lot of water lately & that must have affected the color. I dont believe him. Next day I requested husband take him to PO again for yet another screen they must think were nuts. I suspect we will have both results within the next few days. :grrr:
I guess Im just looking for a vote of confidence :thumb: or been there done that rationale :thumbsdown:for why or why not I should proceed. My plan is (if the tests are positive which everyone on the planet knows they will be except my husband) to immediately transport him to another rehab center; one that is on our insurance plan, then upon his release put him directly into a wilderness camp for another 30+ days. Upon his return home he will have a clear and drug-free head, hopefully do some soul searching and be competent to make a decision concerning what HE WANTS to do with his life. During his away time husband & I will get some counseling :doctor: and come up with a game plan for what we will and will not tolerate from him. I havent exactly worked all that out yet. Obvious things will be go the GED route or traditional diploma either way we will support HIS decision. If he wants to attend college, we will support and pay for that. If not, he will need to get a full-time job while living with us.
As usual, thanks for listening and thanks most for your input. I apologize for all of the icons but it's new to me :smile: