MomOfTwoBoys
New Member
I would like to induced myself I have two boys, one is 21 and is a great kid, he has a great head on his shoulders, he is a junior at a big ten school, and my youngest son is 18. He is smart but unmotivated. He was a senior and as of earlier this month quit school because of lack of motivation in the mornings to get up for his classes.
We moved to a different town to be closer to my husband's work and the opportunity for my son to play competitive baseball this was when he was in 8th grade. He played ever since he was 4, he was left handed pitcher and first baseman. He was/is extremely talented. He made the 8th grade team but, the coach told him don't think you will play in the infield. He already had his favorites on the the team, and my son knew this, but he still gave his all. That year he only played a few times infield. It was hard to watch him lose the love of the game because of such a bad coach. The high school coaches knew how talented he was and could not wait to have him.
We started to see changes in around that time, He was becoming more irritable and lack of self esteem. When he was in middle school he got into trouble a couple of times but nothing horrible. He started high school and his grades started to drop, habitually late for school and then he would refuse to go to class at all.
This has been every year for the past 3 1/2 years. He failed so many classes his freshmen year that he only had 7 credits. I was always in contact with the school to let them know when he refused to go. I was told not to call him in. Let him get the unexcused absence and that way they could discipline him with ISS. Need less to say that never worked. He always repeated the same behavior. We always gave him consequences here at home. Again, never worked. He takes no responsibly for anything he does. A couple of summers back, We were on vacation and he admitted he smoke pot, my husband said we can not "stop" you, but you are not to smoke it in the house or on our premises. We took in his best friend because he had no place to go, his mother was a meth-addict. So, he had a couple of buddies over, it was about 4 or 5 in the afternoon and my husband and I were working outside. Well, my husband smelled pot on the side of the house. We told his one buddy he needed to go, he said that my son told him that we were cool with him smokin it. SMH! Really! We sent that kid home and told him to never come back. My son's best friend is now living with us at this point. We are taking care of him completely I sign him up for high school and we are paying for everything. Basically being this kids parents, we received zero help for this boys family. Said friend said he will make good grades and go to school everyday and he and my son would help motivate each other. Lets just say that never happened. By spring break I kicked his best friend out. They smoked pot and cigarettes in their bedrooms, my carpet is damaged I have damaged screens and walls. No care for our property. We have tried to talk to them. No respect! They also during this time had another friend stay for a few days and I went though the kids book-bag and found MOLLY! What the hell! And he tried to tell me it was his "headache medicine" Whatever, I am not stupid. I found out later the kid was pissed because I got rid of all his MOLLY.
My son has become violent towards me if I try to take his stuff as a punishment. My son has cuss me out a lot. I know it is the pot doing this to him. I told him I believe he has an addiction and he said he does not do it all the time. I told him if you do it as much as I know he does it is a problem. He keeps smoking in his room after multi times telling him not to we can smell it in the house. He said he does not do it in the house we know he is lying we smell it though the vents and he puts a towel in front of his door. Like I said in beginning he quit school at the beginning of this month, They told him if he would just do a few things he could graduate in 3weeks, Guess what road he choose. Now he said he is going to get his GED. We did give him a deadline as of January 31st. He was doing wielding classes. And he was doing great at it. Problem was that he was always late or did not show up. So, that is toast for now.
Earlier this week we smelled pot again coming out of his room and we confronted him about it and he said " Sorry" no, I am sick of hearing sorry. Stop doing it in my house! I was done so I told him to get out. I think he thought is was a joke. He finally left. About an hour later, his "best friend" text me and said "it is 12 degrees out he will freeze to death. I was blown away with that comment. Keep in mind this is coming from the same kid we took in for almost a year. I think it is funny when my son need a place to crash for a few days NONE of his "friends" helped. He is back home for now. He said he does not have any friends, and I am thinking maybe he right. They only are his friends when they need/want something, never the other way around.
We love him with all our heart and want what is best for him. I hope that some day he will realize we always have had his best interests at heart.
We moved to a different town to be closer to my husband's work and the opportunity for my son to play competitive baseball this was when he was in 8th grade. He played ever since he was 4, he was left handed pitcher and first baseman. He was/is extremely talented. He made the 8th grade team but, the coach told him don't think you will play in the infield. He already had his favorites on the the team, and my son knew this, but he still gave his all. That year he only played a few times infield. It was hard to watch him lose the love of the game because of such a bad coach. The high school coaches knew how talented he was and could not wait to have him.
We started to see changes in around that time, He was becoming more irritable and lack of self esteem. When he was in middle school he got into trouble a couple of times but nothing horrible. He started high school and his grades started to drop, habitually late for school and then he would refuse to go to class at all.
This has been every year for the past 3 1/2 years. He failed so many classes his freshmen year that he only had 7 credits. I was always in contact with the school to let them know when he refused to go. I was told not to call him in. Let him get the unexcused absence and that way they could discipline him with ISS. Need less to say that never worked. He always repeated the same behavior. We always gave him consequences here at home. Again, never worked. He takes no responsibly for anything he does. A couple of summers back, We were on vacation and he admitted he smoke pot, my husband said we can not "stop" you, but you are not to smoke it in the house or on our premises. We took in his best friend because he had no place to go, his mother was a meth-addict. So, he had a couple of buddies over, it was about 4 or 5 in the afternoon and my husband and I were working outside. Well, my husband smelled pot on the side of the house. We told his one buddy he needed to go, he said that my son told him that we were cool with him smokin it. SMH! Really! We sent that kid home and told him to never come back. My son's best friend is now living with us at this point. We are taking care of him completely I sign him up for high school and we are paying for everything. Basically being this kids parents, we received zero help for this boys family. Said friend said he will make good grades and go to school everyday and he and my son would help motivate each other. Lets just say that never happened. By spring break I kicked his best friend out. They smoked pot and cigarettes in their bedrooms, my carpet is damaged I have damaged screens and walls. No care for our property. We have tried to talk to them. No respect! They also during this time had another friend stay for a few days and I went though the kids book-bag and found MOLLY! What the hell! And he tried to tell me it was his "headache medicine" Whatever, I am not stupid. I found out later the kid was pissed because I got rid of all his MOLLY.
My son has become violent towards me if I try to take his stuff as a punishment. My son has cuss me out a lot. I know it is the pot doing this to him. I told him I believe he has an addiction and he said he does not do it all the time. I told him if you do it as much as I know he does it is a problem. He keeps smoking in his room after multi times telling him not to we can smell it in the house. He said he does not do it in the house we know he is lying we smell it though the vents and he puts a towel in front of his door. Like I said in beginning he quit school at the beginning of this month, They told him if he would just do a few things he could graduate in 3weeks, Guess what road he choose. Now he said he is going to get his GED. We did give him a deadline as of January 31st. He was doing wielding classes. And he was doing great at it. Problem was that he was always late or did not show up. So, that is toast for now.
Earlier this week we smelled pot again coming out of his room and we confronted him about it and he said " Sorry" no, I am sick of hearing sorry. Stop doing it in my house! I was done so I told him to get out. I think he thought is was a joke. He finally left. About an hour later, his "best friend" text me and said "it is 12 degrees out he will freeze to death. I was blown away with that comment. Keep in mind this is coming from the same kid we took in for almost a year. I think it is funny when my son need a place to crash for a few days NONE of his "friends" helped. He is back home for now. He said he does not have any friends, and I am thinking maybe he right. They only are his friends when they need/want something, never the other way around.
We love him with all our heart and want what is best for him. I hope that some day he will realize we always have had his best interests at heart.