Mattsmom277
Active Member
Hi all. I have been horrible about posting since difficult child moved home last year. I've just had alot on my plate. To update most importantly on difficult child, he is still remarkably doing well. It is just over a year since he moved back home after nearly 18months with him out of the house. He is now 14 (wow! i joined this board when he was 6!!!!), 6'2 (and a half LOL) and wears a mans size 13 shoe! He is in grade 9 and passing his classes. His grades are a bare minimum for passing BUT he is attending, he has had ZERO issues with behaviour at school and does homework without fights. He hates school beyond normal kids hating school. He is struggling with his essential tremors in his hands and his gross and fine motor delays are increasingly a problem. He has been working this semester towards convincing me to homeschool him starting next semester and proving he is capable of homeschooling (self starting, allowing me to help, organization, time management, committment etc). He is turning into one heck of an amazing young man. He is so darn intelligent (and not just because I'm his mom LOL) and the normal school setting is not for him. If it weren't for his history of behaviour issues, he'd be in some type of gifted program. He doesnt' fit the normal mold for how most kids learn. I really believe that homeschooling is going to be the right choice for him. He is very excited about it and actually it turns out he ENJOYS learning! He just hates the setting and ways of teaching/methods of the classroom. We have been patterning ourselves to find the way that he enjoys learning in a way I can be helpful in the process and it is bonding us closer and this kids brain just amazes me. I'm so incredibly proud of him. He is laughing all of the time. Has next to zero anger issues (who'd have thunk it????? The kid who whipped tv's at people???).
So there's the difficult child update. I cannot believe that I can still continue to post positive posts re: difficult child this long into things. I thought after a honeymoon phase he would have reverted to old difficult child ways. There are a few typical teen things, but they are typical and not even worth typing about, that's how typical they are.
easy child is doing awesome. She is 8 now. In her 3rd season of hockey. Blossoming. Straight A's at school. Happy go lucky and content.
Now for the bead rattling/cross fingers portion. So many of you know I have a current diagnosis of "probable MS" and have been struggling. I expect at my new neurologist vist on Jan. that the offical diagnosis will come down. Actually I've already been told it will. So MS it is. Fun (not!). I only about a month ago started improving after a over 2 month period of the worst relapse thus far. I was really struggling not only physically but emotionally as the reality of the unknown future loomed over me like a dark cloud. I really had to recognize my own limitations, learn how to ask for help or support in different ways. Leaning on others is hard for me, made more difficult since I don't really have people to lean on. At about the same time as I was going back into this relapse, I began dating someone. I was terrified for personal reasons (lack of trust in men, faith in relationships, doubt in my own ability to judge good from not good people etc) to date again, but even more so because i really felt like a bum deal, damaged goods. MS isn't fatal but it can be devestating. Then again some people do remarkably well. The uncertainty however can drive one crazy. At that time I was struggling so much physically that I really wasn't in a frame of mind to see that I can't count my chickens, I can't predict my future health so why dread it?
Anyhow, so I had started dating someone and all this was going on. What a huge thing to throw at a newly involved couple! What turned out to be a fear of mine (that my medical stuff would impede a relationship etc) actually forced both him and I to see each other for who we are, what we really want, what we can expect from each other etc. I have never felt so understood, so accepted for who I am. He just rolls with it. When I couldn't walk or do things, he'd just bring me tea, throw on a movie, roll with it, adapt our plans without batting an eye. No animosity, no sense of loss from him because my health impeded things etc. So many times his unflappable manner has helped me just and get off the pot. I feel very blessed to have found him. A hilarious side note re: him. After all I've been through with my difficult child, with my struggles in the past with anxiety and PTSD and depression etc ... I am not involved with, get this, a behaviour therapist for a psychiatric hospital (HAHAHAHAHA). Thought some of you would get a kick out of that. Any of you who remember my mommy dearest stories (re: my bipolar mother) will appreciate the humor in the fact that I told him he will NEVER meet my mother .
So anyhow, this past Friday my ear hurts a bit. By Saturday morning I'm at a walk in clinic in so much pain and my face is swelling, my ear is nearly closed up. I had a ear infection that spread into the nerves along the entire left side of my face (from eye, down cheek into my jaw, teeth hurt even). By 4a.m. I was at the E.R. and my ear was completely closed and I had zero hearing, my face was swelling. More treatment and sent home with warning on when I should return and if it came to that I'd be admitted. By 11p.m. I was back at E.R. and was admitted to hospital within about 20 minutes of my arrival. Was on I.V. steroids, 2 IV antibiotics and morphine. I can't explain the pain. Due to confusion between my family doctor and the ENT specialist via my chart at the nurse's station, I was released when I shouldn't have been. I am now home (not sure for how long) on oral antibiotics and ear drops. I am not worsening, nor am I improving. I still cannot hear out of my left ear. Still in pain. Thankfully the time on IV medications DID help me improve enough that I am not going out of my mind in agony, although the pain is pretty horrible. Since release however I am staying the same. So a re-admission may happen. I will see the ENT tomorrow and see what he thinks I should do. The infection is also in my glands (prada gland? Never even heard of it before???).
So I'm asking you all here to please cross some fingers. I have only had a few weeks feeling physically better after 2 months or so of hell medically. Christmas is around the corner and I haven't even shopped, I hadn't been well enough and just as I was feeling better and could have started, this hit. I can't handle air on my ear so I am housebound at this time. I just want to be pain free, be able to HEAR, and be able to enjoy a nice quiet Christmas with my children. We've all had such a strange year of ups and downs. My MS thing has been hard on the kids this year, and last christmas was flaring up badly and dampered the holidays. I am emotionally invested in making this holiday a special time of just good feelings for me and the kids. It is just super important to me.
I thank you all on the Christmas card exchange list for the cards that have started to arrive this week. I just recieved Star's card yesterday with the list of all of your addresses. I plan to spend this evening addressing and writing up all of your cards and will mail them or have someone else mail them, tomorrow. I apologize if some of you in really southern US don't get them before the 25th. Mail crawls from Canada to the US this close to Christmas. In the meantime, my fridge is rapidly filling up with the cards from all of you. I love the card exchange tradition!!!!
I hope that you all have a peaceful and happy holiday, wether you celebrate Christmas or not. I wish you all great things in 2008! I can't believe I've been on this board for so many years. Even when I'm unable to be active on the board, which has happened several times, I always know you are all here. And I do read every few days minimum even if I don't post. I like to know how my board peeps are doing :wink:
Thanx in advance for any positive vibes!
Melissa
So there's the difficult child update. I cannot believe that I can still continue to post positive posts re: difficult child this long into things. I thought after a honeymoon phase he would have reverted to old difficult child ways. There are a few typical teen things, but they are typical and not even worth typing about, that's how typical they are.
easy child is doing awesome. She is 8 now. In her 3rd season of hockey. Blossoming. Straight A's at school. Happy go lucky and content.
Now for the bead rattling/cross fingers portion. So many of you know I have a current diagnosis of "probable MS" and have been struggling. I expect at my new neurologist vist on Jan. that the offical diagnosis will come down. Actually I've already been told it will. So MS it is. Fun (not!). I only about a month ago started improving after a over 2 month period of the worst relapse thus far. I was really struggling not only physically but emotionally as the reality of the unknown future loomed over me like a dark cloud. I really had to recognize my own limitations, learn how to ask for help or support in different ways. Leaning on others is hard for me, made more difficult since I don't really have people to lean on. At about the same time as I was going back into this relapse, I began dating someone. I was terrified for personal reasons (lack of trust in men, faith in relationships, doubt in my own ability to judge good from not good people etc) to date again, but even more so because i really felt like a bum deal, damaged goods. MS isn't fatal but it can be devestating. Then again some people do remarkably well. The uncertainty however can drive one crazy. At that time I was struggling so much physically that I really wasn't in a frame of mind to see that I can't count my chickens, I can't predict my future health so why dread it?
Anyhow, so I had started dating someone and all this was going on. What a huge thing to throw at a newly involved couple! What turned out to be a fear of mine (that my medical stuff would impede a relationship etc) actually forced both him and I to see each other for who we are, what we really want, what we can expect from each other etc. I have never felt so understood, so accepted for who I am. He just rolls with it. When I couldn't walk or do things, he'd just bring me tea, throw on a movie, roll with it, adapt our plans without batting an eye. No animosity, no sense of loss from him because my health impeded things etc. So many times his unflappable manner has helped me just and get off the pot. I feel very blessed to have found him. A hilarious side note re: him. After all I've been through with my difficult child, with my struggles in the past with anxiety and PTSD and depression etc ... I am not involved with, get this, a behaviour therapist for a psychiatric hospital (HAHAHAHAHA). Thought some of you would get a kick out of that. Any of you who remember my mommy dearest stories (re: my bipolar mother) will appreciate the humor in the fact that I told him he will NEVER meet my mother .
So anyhow, this past Friday my ear hurts a bit. By Saturday morning I'm at a walk in clinic in so much pain and my face is swelling, my ear is nearly closed up. I had a ear infection that spread into the nerves along the entire left side of my face (from eye, down cheek into my jaw, teeth hurt even). By 4a.m. I was at the E.R. and my ear was completely closed and I had zero hearing, my face was swelling. More treatment and sent home with warning on when I should return and if it came to that I'd be admitted. By 11p.m. I was back at E.R. and was admitted to hospital within about 20 minutes of my arrival. Was on I.V. steroids, 2 IV antibiotics and morphine. I can't explain the pain. Due to confusion between my family doctor and the ENT specialist via my chart at the nurse's station, I was released when I shouldn't have been. I am now home (not sure for how long) on oral antibiotics and ear drops. I am not worsening, nor am I improving. I still cannot hear out of my left ear. Still in pain. Thankfully the time on IV medications DID help me improve enough that I am not going out of my mind in agony, although the pain is pretty horrible. Since release however I am staying the same. So a re-admission may happen. I will see the ENT tomorrow and see what he thinks I should do. The infection is also in my glands (prada gland? Never even heard of it before???).
So I'm asking you all here to please cross some fingers. I have only had a few weeks feeling physically better after 2 months or so of hell medically. Christmas is around the corner and I haven't even shopped, I hadn't been well enough and just as I was feeling better and could have started, this hit. I can't handle air on my ear so I am housebound at this time. I just want to be pain free, be able to HEAR, and be able to enjoy a nice quiet Christmas with my children. We've all had such a strange year of ups and downs. My MS thing has been hard on the kids this year, and last christmas was flaring up badly and dampered the holidays. I am emotionally invested in making this holiday a special time of just good feelings for me and the kids. It is just super important to me.
I thank you all on the Christmas card exchange list for the cards that have started to arrive this week. I just recieved Star's card yesterday with the list of all of your addresses. I plan to spend this evening addressing and writing up all of your cards and will mail them or have someone else mail them, tomorrow. I apologize if some of you in really southern US don't get them before the 25th. Mail crawls from Canada to the US this close to Christmas. In the meantime, my fridge is rapidly filling up with the cards from all of you. I love the card exchange tradition!!!!
I hope that you all have a peaceful and happy holiday, wether you celebrate Christmas or not. I wish you all great things in 2008! I can't believe I've been on this board for so many years. Even when I'm unable to be active on the board, which has happened several times, I always know you are all here. And I do read every few days minimum even if I don't post. I like to know how my board peeps are doing :wink:
Thanx in advance for any positive vibes!
Melissa