Update.... erratic behaviours

[GoingNorth]

To make it worse, benzos (and alcohol) are the two addictions where withdrawal without medical supervision (usually inpatient) can be lethal.

It's not like, say...heroin withdrawal, where the addict just wishes they were dead for a week or two.

Benzo/alcohol withdrawal can cause fatal seizures amongst other things including blood pressure dysregulation.

 

[RN0441]

And can cause death! My son's drug of choice is benzos! And throw in some weed and some alcohol for good measure!!

He can't get ed up enough I guess!!

I honestly think by thinking our Difficult Child (ren) are mentally ill it keeps us in the "save them" mode. They are not themselves when they are using drugs period.

The intake supervisor at the place my son is going in a few weeks (by the grace of God it all goes smoothly) said that MOST of these guys have depression and anxiety. Who wouldn't with their lifestyles???? From what he's seen (and he's seen a lot) most do not have mental illness; it's the drugs, guilt, etc. etc.

I am thinking more and more that this is the case in most of our Difficult Child (ren). I think it's the rule rather than the exception.

 

[Kathy813]

Not only do we parents use mental illness as an excuse . . . our alcoholic/addicts do, too. My daughter used her "social anxiety disorder" as a reason that she needed benzos. She used the poor, poor me excuse of mental illness for years as an excuse for her addictions.

The truth is, once she got sober, she doesn't display the same mental illness symptoms that she did when she was using.

In fact, she takes great exception to being called borderline now which was one of her diagnoses. Her manipulative behavior was caused by her addiction and is gone now with sobriety.

You are right, RN. I kept thinking if it was mental illness it wasn't my daughter's fault and that I just needed to find the right doctor, the right medications, the right program and I could fix everything. Turned out my daughter needed to fix it herself.

 

[Littleboylost]

Not only do we get hung up on this. So do the workers in the system. OP rehab says she feels my son is too unstable to look at long term rehab. He needs a psychiatric evaluation. I contacted the local mixed disorders clinic and they explained that the patient needs rehab first....because most MH issues normalize with rehab. You think she would know this. So frustrating. As if I don't second guess myself enough already.

 

[RN0441]

Colleen:

Any updates on your son? How are YOU doing?

 

[ColleenB]

Thanks for asking RN.

So far it's been a quiet week. He still has a black eye but is healing. He seems sober.

To be honest I'm trying to not contact him everyday and live my life without the paralyzing fear I usually feel. I love him and hope he can stay sober but his track record up to now hasn't been great.

On a positive he said he visited the college counsellor and said he liked her. That's about all I know.

 

[Littleboylost]

Thanks for the update CB. Wishing you peace.