Percy. When we arrive at this site, we are defeated. What else would bring a parent to ask the internet what to do? That is the club to which we belong. It is not your job to stop him. This is not your problem. It is his. This infuriates me. How dare he? What he thinks is the least important thing. Unimportant, actually. Somehow he has gotten the idea that he is powerful, and more powerful than you. He is acting from this space. This is the problem. There are options. RN asked the central question. What do you think you should do? All of our ideas and thoughts mean nothing, as the only people who matter are you and your husband. What about a wilderness program? What about sending him to a gap year program abroad? What about foster care? You may be obligated to support him for a few months more but it is not stipulated how and where. But you are searching for a specific result, that is different from what each of us conceives, may have wanted for ourselves...each of us has specific capacities and needs. My state too. I mean, you can give in, if you want. If this is what you feel makes sense. If you feel that the consequences to you and your other children, are not serious, this is an option, if you feel it makes sense. I have thought about it. But as I said I have no minor children and no necessity in terms of my profession to maintain the law. Only to observe it myself, as far as I know. What is this? You are talking about the at-home drug tests, here. Still, I see this as a huge problem. The elephant in the room. That he has defeated his parents, and feels omnipotent. We have responsibilities to our difficult children, too. How is this good for him? The sense that he by his force of will, can defeat anybody, especially his parents? I think RN asked the pivotal questions. What do you think will work? What do you want to do?