Copa, I am so happy for you. He sounds like he is in a better place and proactive. I love the "I will be alert and ready to respond".
My brother had a good Samaritan save his life with CPR.
I witnessed some posturing of my brother while he was in an induced state after his cardiac arrect. Posturing, such as twisting his hands under, is often indicative of brain injury. At first, I thought that he was affected. He would glare at me and struggle with his wrists being tied to prevent him from pulling out his tubes. The male nurse said that he would leave us alone. I asked him not to, right then... He scared me.
When he had the breathing tube taken out and spoke, he seemed different. He spoke of a gunman making the nurses cry. We were watching a kids' movie and he said, "Oh no, kids, you should not do that. Turn around". I thought my gifted brother was gone. One night I called to say good night after I had seen him all day, and he said that he would be right there... I told him to stop. He ripped out the IV lines and ran down the hallway.
He was vested after this, or tied to the bed railings. The last thing he did was carry a heavy armchair out to the hallway to watch people. He had a precursor to another cardiac arrest and had a defibrillator placed.
One year later he calls casually to tell me he has a problem with it. I drove him to the hospital. The triage nurse wanted to see the problem. He calmly lifted his shirt. His defibrillator had eroded partially out of his chest. The plastic was sticking out! More surgery.
More brother soon was acting like himself again. The point of my whole long story is that I wanted to blame the cardiac arrest and perhaps some loss of cognitive acuity for my brother's continual lying and stealing from the estate and trust. Yes, I thought, that makes sense. But most of it took place well before his cardiac arrest. No excuses.
Cedar of love your line about "the world of the young woman we were was not more beautiful than this one. Okay. It was, in some ways having to do with beautiful men". Visions of Arnold, Cedar???
I must admit Cedars image of your stay, Copa, at a house of ill repute was a very hard act to follow...A beautiful red-haired lady washing her feet in the sun, sweat going down the side of the glass.
Then, Cedar, you spoke of exotic desserts. Yes...I could clearly picture exotic desserts. But, I digress. Incidentally, 'stressed' spelled backwards spells... yes, you guessed it, 'desserts'. Coincidence? I beseech you to search your conscience. Yes, Copa, beseech.
Others, in our group are sadly, neglecting to incorporate our words of the day in their posts. No mentioning of specific names...because I do not nag anymore being a warrior and all. Is beseeching considered nagging. See what I did...I cleverly worked it in again.
But, Copa, your big flashing "Girls, Girls, Girls" sign with a hardened lady of the evening giving you a long hug was very sweet. You and M cooking complete Thanksgiving meals was truly beautiful. Beauty found where one might least expect it. Beautiful.
Well, so much for trying to lose the startle reflex. Scary and jumpy night, but, gladly no screaming!
I have read and reread your posts, kadies, several times. Thank you. I will try to not put a ending to my story. I will think of the positives.
My middle son drove south all the way down the coast twice when this happened to make me feel better. He told me, " Just because you are sad, doesn't mean that it was the wrong thing to do". He also says that in life we are all trying to do our best. It is no one's fault.
He is sad. He has never had a real girlfriend. He is a biologist. He never wants to have kids and take the risk of having one become schizophrenic. He told me once that I rolled the dice and lost. My late onset schizophrenic sister had her biologist fiancée dump her in her twenties when he found out that my other sister had it. I told my middle son that he could adopt. He just seems depressed and does not date. His heart is breaking about my ill son.
Copa, you handled everything oerfectly....visions of cute Chinese Crested Cannines...an alteration. ..giving you strength!
How is M? Your house sounds big. My thawing is the same yet different from yours or Cedar's. Copa, you will thaw and slowly do more, go out more, and be more... slowly, in you own time...or rather, defrosting time.
I am so proud of all of us. We continue to be warriors facing life bravely.
Time for operation lights on. 4 of 7 nights down...3 to go. Yay! Warriors!!!
