Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Cool on both accounts!
Off to,work...
Off to,work...
Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
- Thread starter Feeling Sad
- Start date
Copa. They LET you take a border collie, KNOWING you would be working during the day???
What kind of a shelter does that? (I know, lots do - but it's wrong, especially if you are held more responsible than they are for a poor match)
Border collie can be left alone for a few hours. But really, needs to be with you and doing things, close to 24/7. They are not couch potatoes! We had a border collie cross... lots of fun, but lots of energy and time required... unless your time is taken up with things where they can come along and burn up energy (like hiking, or fixing fences, or...)
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Thank you, Apple. I am hanging in there, like all of us are doing.
Yes, if I did not have that small joint account that lets me know that he is alive, eating, and his general location, I would have fallen apart a long time ago.
It is like a horrible nightmare that I cannot wake up from. Come to think of it, it is for my ill son, as well..... It is truly sad all the way around.
My therapist thinks that I should forward the letter from In and Out to my son about claiming a lost item to the local shelter. He does not know that I know that he went there...months ago. Now, he probably takes his showers at the 24 hour gym he joined this month, so I do not know if he still goes there.
If he does still go there, I do not want to make him bolt. He is very paranoid. I do not know what to do.
We got him a cell phone that my youngest son handed him the day that he was served the restraining order. He has never once used it. He is allowed to contact my youngest son. My youngest son knows to never meet him alone.
My ill son only called me twice in 10 years. My youngest son could write him a note saying that this was the only place that we could think of to forward the letter. I just do not to freak him out. I do not know what to do.
How are you doing?
Yes, if I did not have that small joint account that lets me know that he is alive, eating, and his general location, I would have fallen apart a long time ago.
It is like a horrible nightmare that I cannot wake up from. Come to think of it, it is for my ill son, as well..... It is truly sad all the way around.
My therapist thinks that I should forward the letter from In and Out to my son about claiming a lost item to the local shelter. He does not know that I know that he went there...months ago. Now, he probably takes his showers at the 24 hour gym he joined this month, so I do not know if he still goes there.
If he does still go there, I do not want to make him bolt. He is very paranoid. I do not know what to do.
We got him a cell phone that my youngest son handed him the day that he was served the restraining order. He has never once used it. He is allowed to contact my youngest son. My youngest son knows to never meet him alone.
My ill son only called me twice in 10 years. My youngest son could write him a note saying that this was the only place that we could think of to forward the letter. I just do not to freak him out. I do not know what to do.
How are you doing?
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
I just got off of mine...I still love it. You will enjoy it. So far, I just do the regular striding and every few minutes I do 20 leg lifts at the same time going sideways...for my inner thighs. It is easy to use, I can watch the news or have dinner simmering. It is very easy to wheel off to another room. I have mine in the family room. It tells you how many calories you are burning. I do 20 minutes a night....working toward my free Dead Lobster meal from my son.
What do you think I should do? I contacted the main office lost and found at In and Out. They called me back. I answered all of the questions from my son's driver's license. I told him that I do not want it to be thrown away. I said that my son has not lived here for a few months, does not use a phone, and I may know where he is living...I was vague. He just said, "Then, I will mail it out to you.
Now, I am in a bigger quandry. Do I have my youngest son still mail a quick note to the shelter? Now, it will not have the letter from In and Out. It would state that he is mailing a letter to several shelters in hopes of reaching him. Please text me the address I may send it to. My youngest son would, again, give him his phone number.
I am afraid that in his paranoid state, that this may cause him to leave the local area. That is a con. Now, he would have to tell him the address to the shelter. Remember, he does not know that I know that he is going or has gone there. He told them NOT to tell me. That is a con. He would know that his brother still cares about him and is reaching out for a viable reason. That is a pro.
I do not know what he would do. If he sent a note and he ran off to a different city or state, I would kick myself
My therapist thinks that I should and also have him mention that I miss him and can see him in 4 1/2 years.
My best friend says not to mention the sentencing of the court or me at all.
My concern is that I do not want him to get a new driver's license and change the address on it. He has hemoplilia and could be in an accident. I want my address on it. He does not carry a phone. My son says that they would keep the address the same, unless he put in for a change of address. He needs to have it mailed to the shelter though.
What should I do? I am very afraid to 'feed' any conspiracy delusions that he holds. It might make him bolt. I feel much better knowing that he is in town and around familiar areas.
I need to get back on my "Stresser", I mean my Strider. It is really excellent to assuage stress!
I will 'take it in stride', like you said. That should be their slogan!!!
What do you think I should do? I contacted the main office lost and found at In and Out. They called me back. I answered all of the questions from my son's driver's license. I told him that I do not want it to be thrown away. I said that my son has not lived here for a few months, does not use a phone, and I may know where he is living...I was vague. He just said, "Then, I will mail it out to you.
Now, I am in a bigger quandry. Do I have my youngest son still mail a quick note to the shelter? Now, it will not have the letter from In and Out. It would state that he is mailing a letter to several shelters in hopes of reaching him. Please text me the address I may send it to. My youngest son would, again, give him his phone number.
I am afraid that in his paranoid state, that this may cause him to leave the local area. That is a con. Now, he would have to tell him the address to the shelter. Remember, he does not know that I know that he is going or has gone there. He told them NOT to tell me. That is a con. He would know that his brother still cares about him and is reaching out for a viable reason. That is a pro.
I do not know what he would do. If he sent a note and he ran off to a different city or state, I would kick myself
My therapist thinks that I should and also have him mention that I miss him and can see him in 4 1/2 years.
My best friend says not to mention the sentencing of the court or me at all.
My concern is that I do not want him to get a new driver's license and change the address on it. He has hemoplilia and could be in an accident. I want my address on it. He does not carry a phone. My son says that they would keep the address the same, unless he put in for a change of address. He needs to have it mailed to the shelter though.
What should I do? I am very afraid to 'feed' any conspiracy delusions that he holds. It might make him bolt. I feel much better knowing that he is in town and around familiar areas.
I need to get back on my "Stresser", I mean my Strider. It is really excellent to assuage stress!
I will 'take it in stride', like you said. That should be their slogan!!!
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Is that the 'new" you dancing about, Leafy? You look slim!
New Leaf
Well-Known Member
Not yet but I will get there. Just came back from my walk (missed this morning). Going to Costco, then home (son done paddling).
I can't wait to get my strider! Yay! I liked it because of the sideways motion, I need to work on my hip mobility.
I am hoping hubs will use it (he has bad knees). The no impact is good.
Thanks again for the heads up......
Okay ttl got to go......
leafy.....
I can't wait to get my strider! Yay! I liked it because of the sideways motion, I need to work on my hip mobility.
I am hoping hubs will use it (he has bad knees). The no impact is good.
Thanks again for the heads up......
Okay ttl got to go......
leafy.....
Copabanana
Well-Known Member
I would worry about contacting the shelters. I would worry that it could make him feel paranoid. After all, if you know he asked that you not be told if he is there, there is a reason. And I am remembering his feelings about his brother.
I think he might feel stalked. And in a way, this would be true. Even though you are his mother, and everybody would understand you are wanting to keep tabs.
I would find another solution, one that does not have the risks. Personally, I do not think he will change his address. I think he wants as much or more to maintain the link with you and home as you want it. But he wants to be in control. I would respect that.
Like you said, your interests are served too that he stays in the area. There are ways to periodically check on him which have no risk.
I am glad you have found the wallet.
If there is any contacting the shelter, I think I would tell the shelter, "I am his mother. I have the wallet he lost. He can call his brother at xxx number, any time, if he chooses. Can you please tell him how much I love and miss him?"
See. The thing is it you who he misses. I think that would mean something for you to call. But still I would try not to.
COPA
I think he might feel stalked. And in a way, this would be true. Even though you are his mother, and everybody would understand you are wanting to keep tabs.
I would find another solution, one that does not have the risks. Personally, I do not think he will change his address. I think he wants as much or more to maintain the link with you and home as you want it. But he wants to be in control. I would respect that.
Like you said, your interests are served too that he stays in the area. There are ways to periodically check on him which have no risk.
I am glad you have found the wallet.
If there is any contacting the shelter, I think I would tell the shelter, "I am his mother. I have the wallet he lost. He can call his brother at xxx number, any time, if he chooses. Can you please tell him how much I love and miss him?"
See. The thing is it you who he misses. I think that would mean something for you to call. But still I would try not to.
COPA
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Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
You will like it. It makes exercising more fun. Yes, it is good for your joints...no impact and gives you strength. I might start using it in the morning before work, as well as, at night.
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Copa, I am feeling the same way. I do not think that I should have my youngest son send a note. My ill son is not mad a my youngest son. He dislikes the middle son. They fought because my ill son kept turning off our internet, which ran through his room, while he was taking finals online for college. My youngest son feels that he is mad at him because he let the police in that day.
I agree. He told the shelter not to tell me. Also, he is very paranoid. The shelter will not advise me, because they cannot let on that he is there.
I found out that it was not his wallet, but just his driver's license. My youngest son feels the same. He said that then he would know that we knew where he is. Our shelter does not have beds. They go to different churches each night from November through March. I am sure that he is still in his car.
My youngest son said that he did not think that the gym he joined had showers. If not, he is going to exercise or get warmth and is still going to the shelter for showers. I will check into it.
Thank you for the advice. It is so difficult to decide my course of action because one cannot apply normal reason and logic. I do not want to scare him off. Remember, I went into his room one time 10 years ago due to flooding, and he ran off to Washington to live in his car for a year. Sadly, his delusions involve me and he thinks that he is being spied upon by others...
Did you get an inhaler refill, my dear friend? I still need both my blood sugar being tested and a MRI, with and without contrast. I fear the blood test, not the MRI.
Thank you, again. I will sleep a bit better tonight.
I agree. He told the shelter not to tell me. Also, he is very paranoid. The shelter will not advise me, because they cannot let on that he is there.
I found out that it was not his wallet, but just his driver's license. My youngest son feels the same. He said that then he would know that we knew where he is. Our shelter does not have beds. They go to different churches each night from November through March. I am sure that he is still in his car.
My youngest son said that he did not think that the gym he joined had showers. If not, he is going to exercise or get warmth and is still going to the shelter for showers. I will check into it.
Thank you for the advice. It is so difficult to decide my course of action because one cannot apply normal reason and logic. I do not want to scare him off. Remember, I went into his room one time 10 years ago due to flooding, and he ran off to Washington to live in his car for a year. Sadly, his delusions involve me and he thinks that he is being spied upon by others...
Did you get an inhaler refill, my dear friend? I still need both my blood sugar being tested and a MRI, with and without contrast. I fear the blood test, not the MRI.
Thank you, again. I will sleep a bit better tonight.
Copabanana
Well-Known Member
I did not get my medications because I changed insurance and somehow already lost my cards. The inhaler is 300 dollars a month!! And that is one medicine only. I called for duplicates.
I am glad I got the blood work done and know I have to work on my cholesterol. I will be getting an endoscopy too to try to figure out why I throw up blood. So that is a good thing.
Now it is your turn to do your MRI and the other test.
I hope you sleep well and peacefully.
COPA
I am glad I got the blood work done and know I have to work on my cholesterol. I will be getting an endoscopy too to try to figure out why I throw up blood. So that is a good thing.
Now it is your turn to do your MRI and the other test.
I hope you sleep well and peacefully.
COPA
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
You throw up blood? I did not know that. Keep me in the loop. I am sure that you are fine. Stress is hard on one's body.
Yes, it is my turn. It just feel like I will completely fall apart with anymore bad news. I really am trying to 'protect' myself, but in doing so, I am sort of putting myself in possible danger, healthwise. It is the first time I realized this. Putting it down in print clarifies my intentions. Hmmm... Maybe if I do it, then I would have one less thing to worry about...or more. Do you see why I can't sleep?
I think that I am like most mother's on this site. We put our children's health first, our health is put way down on the priority list. As if that wasn't enough, the stress they cause slowly erodes away our health and well-being, bit by bit. Is that what it means to "love them to death"? Just joking. A bit of dark humor. Time to try to go to sleep. I have a long, complicated in-service tomorrow after work. The fun never ends.
Yes, it is my turn. It just feel like I will completely fall apart with anymore bad news. I really am trying to 'protect' myself, but in doing so, I am sort of putting myself in possible danger, healthwise. It is the first time I realized this. Putting it down in print clarifies my intentions. Hmmm... Maybe if I do it, then I would have one less thing to worry about...or more. Do you see why I can't sleep?
I think that I am like most mother's on this site. We put our children's health first, our health is put way down on the priority list. As if that wasn't enough, the stress they cause slowly erodes away our health and well-being, bit by bit. Is that what it means to "love them to death"? Just joking. A bit of dark humor. Time to try to go to sleep. I have a long, complicated in-service tomorrow after work. The fun never ends.
New Leaf
Well-Known Member
Hi Feeling, I hope you had a good nights rest and your day goes well.
Get your test done, dear, at least you will know.
It is better than wondering and worrying.
Take care, one more day......
((((HUGS))))
leafy
Copabanana
Well-Known Member
Hi Feeling,
I am here only to say hi. It is almost the end of your week. Good. I hope you are well, and can rest and relax a lot.
COPA
I am here only to say hi. It is almost the end of your week. Good. I hope you are well, and can rest and relax a lot.
COPA
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Sorry that it has been awhile. I have had really bad vertigo for 3 days. I am praying that I am well enough to go to work tomorrow...my classroom is on top of a very small hill. I walk like I am drunk right now. I was in bed all weekend and could barely sit up. Send positive thoughts my way. Tomorrow I am wearing flats. It will challenging enough already...
My thoughts and prayers are with you all tonight.
My thoughts and prayers are with you all tonight.
Feeling Sad
Well-Known Member
Hi. The first time I had vertigo was last December. The doctor gave me valium.
I went back in yesterday, and the doctor gave me meclizine. I feel much better, thank you.
It is still quite stressful at work, but at least I am not walking like a drunken sailor in a stiff breeze...
I can eat normally, again, without the nausea.
The doctor was not worried about my pre diabetes or my past brain tumor. She said that it could be viral in nature. So, I am feeling less worried about my health.
So now I am able to devote even more time to worrying about my ill son...just joking.
As always...day by day.
I went back in yesterday, and the doctor gave me meclizine. I feel much better, thank you.
It is still quite stressful at work, but at least I am not walking like a drunken sailor in a stiff breeze...
I can eat normally, again, without the nausea.
The doctor was not worried about my pre diabetes or my past brain tumor. She said that it could be viral in nature. So, I am feeling less worried about my health.
So now I am able to devote even more time to worrying about my ill son...just joking.
As always...day by day.
