How are you handling your will

[tryingtobestrong]

I would like to switch attorneys but hate the fact that I will be charged for her time. She is doing the power of attorneys and the living will as well.
She said she met with the other 2 attorneys in the firm and the both agreed that it shouldn't be held in a trust and drug out over a lengthy period of time.... I am reaching out to others now to see how they would handle it.

 

[overcome mom]

I don't know how much money you have but it's your money if you want it to be handed out slowly then that is up to you. It sounds like they may not have had to deal with a child with addiction/MH problems. The power of attorney and living wills are pretty much forms with a few special lines of specifics. Did they give you reasons why they didn't want a trust? You could just have them do the power of attorney and living will and then find someone else to do the other. All I know is if my son got a lump sum I might as well just flush it down the toilet . I also worry that he would use it to buy to many drugs and OD.

 

[Kathy813]

I agree with overcome mom. The attorneys are supposed to be working for you and creating a will that follows your wishes. I would find someone else.

 

[OTE]

Sorry I'm missing something here. 3 attorneys got together and agreed that your cash should not be put into a trust and distributed over time? Why not? There is a reason I'm missing. So its not because your child has the right to blow it on drugs?

Only thing I can imagine is that they're saying that the costs of the trust would be more than the money you're putting in. Meaning that your child would eventually end up with so little that its pointless. Why let all the money go to expenses, is that what they're saying? If so then you need to look for a type of investment that will give him the money in a way you find acceptable. That is a different topic.

In terms of an investment that would pay out later you're looking for something like a fixed annuity. Or maybe something that pays out in a balloon payment. Could be more than one investment so that the payout is staggered. Needs to be something that is non-transferable

But again, your attorney should be recommending a course of action other than to let the child have it knowing it will be used on drugs.

As to attorney fees. Yes but this is short term pain. Keep it in perspective.

 

[bluebell]

OTE,
I imagine you are right on thinking the trust would be too expensive. They usually are and only estates in the millions are really worth that. I agree to look into an annuity. But a financial advisor might be more keen to discuss this than an attorney. Is there such a profession as an attorney who is also a financial advisor? Wouldn't that be a boon?

 

[Kathy813]

When we created our will, we didn't have to create a trust. We just stipulated that our older daughter's portion of the money in the inheritance would be doled out by a friend that we named in the will. It didn't cost us any extra.

 

[RN0441]

Hi RN. I read your post and thought about it overnight. I don't look at what we did as punishment... more like an early payout on an inheritance.

My younger daughter really resented what we spent on our older daughter. Had it been a small amount she wouldn't have cared but it was a six figure amount. She thought that we were just throwing the money away since our older daughter obviously didn't want to get sober.

Our solution went a long way towards healing the rift between the two of them. My younger daughter thought it was fair and was happy that the older one was fine with the arrangement.

I think the age thing is where it comes in that you had to adjust her inheritance. I get that! I though of you after I posted it and thought I should have added a disclaimer.

 

[OTE]

Kathy,
The question is who's name is the money in? Presumably not the friend's and not the child's. So who's? Probably an ongoing estate? Same as a trust. Still annual tax returns for the trust for sure. No difference really.

Bluebell,
I'm sure they exist. Each profession has its own licensing requirements, education requirements, etc. Just like people who are both doctors and lawyers. They exist. But they sure spent a lot of years hitting the books! LOL

 

[Elsi]

OTE,
I imagine you are right on thinking the trust would be too expensive. They usually are and only estates in the millions are really worth that. I agree to look into an annuity. But a financial advisor might be more keen to discuss this than an attorney. Is there such a profession as an attorney who is also a financial advisor? Wouldn't that be a boon?

I don’t have one that is both, but I do have a financial advisor who is knowledgeable about the legal issues and willing to help me with a strategy. I’m going to sit down with her first, and she’s going to help me lay out a plan and tell me exactly what I need to ask the lawyer for. She has a couple lawyers she works with and can recommend. Perhaps you can find someone similar? I like mine - she’s very no nonsense. Time to get on that this fall!

 

[BusynMember]

We have a Special Needs trust set up for my son with autism. It is the only way for him to have money but not lose the supports he will always need. My lawyer, a family friend, is in charge and we have a young back up if anything happens to him. For us, we dont want our kids to have to handle one anothers money. I think its even hard to be will executor so we arent putting that on the kids either. The lawyer will do it. Its nice to have a local lawyer who has also become a dear friend. He has gotten us through many things as well as joining us for barbecues and blessing us with his company. My husband does his cars. .

We got advice but were not told what to do.